The Gusty Gusset

YOU REALLY couldn’t make it up . . . another selection of oddball items for sale . . .

FOR SALE: One pair hardly used dentures, only 2 teeth ,issing. $100 ono.

FULL SIZE mattress - Royal Tonic, 20 year warranty. Like new. Slight urine smell $40.

USED TOILET paper for sale. I have a wide selection of brands and designs, call for details and prices.

TURKEY FOR SALE. Partially eaten. Only eight days old. Both drumsticks still intact. $23 obo.

PONY FOR SALE - looks like small horse.

FOR SALE small bag of children. Very heavy can deliver.

FOR SALE Bonsai tree - very large. £80.

FOR SALE: Holiday photos: Choice of ski, sun or city break. Ideal for anecdote or alibi.

HITACHI WASHING machine DX250, under warranty until kill kill kill, kill them all February 2004, in perfect working order. £180 ono.

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YOU REALLY couldn’t make it up . . . another selection of oddball items for sale . . .

BAG OF assorted boys. Many different shapes, sizes and colours. All good quality - no rubbish stuff.

ROCKING FINGER as new, hardly used.

HALF CAN of paint, unsure of colour - think is cacky.

SCREW FOR sale. Open to offers.

USED BODY bits - shop clearance.

PINK GIRLS 3 months old and available now.

BROKEN TABLE - have tried fixing it with cellotape but failed. Be of use to someone who can fix it better than me.

BOX OF used string. Assorted lengths. Some has been nibbled by rats.

WOBBLING BOTTOM in beige.

TABLE WITH only a few legs - needs good home.

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YOU REALLY couldn’t make it up . . . a selection of real ads found in the classifieds of assorted publications. Contact details have been omitted to protect the not-so-innocent . . .

BAG OF boys 2-3yrs, various colours £15.

DOLPHINS GLOW in the dark never been opened therefore unused £2.50.

DESKTOP PC 15′ flat screen, burning, back rest on chair broke, need to know anything ring me £200.

OFF WHITE 2ft high, immac cond £5.

NOKIA 6300 in black with charger, sim and spare battery. Silver colour. Excellent condition £50.

BAG OF newborn - all good condition and quality, will separate £15.

POLICEMAN FANCY trousers truncheon with sounds vgc £5.

BABY DAN with fixings and expandabe walking leg accessories, £15.

FEATHER AND down old king - very nice £25.

BABY BUM seat - very useful to help £15.

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YOU REALLY couldn’t make it up . . . another selection of curious classifieds from assorted publications. Contact details have been omitted to protect the not-so-innocent . . .

PHILIPS HEATED hostess, warming drawer move forces sale, bargain £40.

THREE ARM centre antique brass finish move forces sale £25 each.

SILVER LADIES still in box unused £20.

LEATHER BLUE baby, very soft cost £60 accept £10.

TODDLER GIRLS assorted sizes and colours. Large bag full £35. Can deliver.

FIFI BUBBLE car with detachable toddler. As new in box £10.

GOOD PART worn 3 nearly new, 1 new £20 each.

CAR SEAT from birth leftover. In vgc £8.

BLACK AND DECKER cordless hedge as new £10.

BISHOPS TUBS. Offers.

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YOU REALLY couldn’t make it up . . . another selection of curious classifieds from assorted publications. Contact details have been omitted to protect the not-so-innocent . . .

DOG FOR sale: eats anything and is fond of children.

PADDED CELL inserts attaches underneath with elastic strap. VGC. Bright colours - square animals.

MIXING BOWL ideal for making lovely mash.

USED PORTA potti - reasonably clean. Used lots so know it works £15.

CHALLENGE £5.

HAND DRAWN sewing machine - bit rough but sort of works £10.

GREAT DAMES for sale.

LOVELY CONDITION with hardly used beech legs £120. Sorry no offers.

ONE MUG very lonely - missing other half broken in accident. Needs new home £1.50. Can deliver.

HORRIBLE PICTURE in dirty brown and yellow - some sort of shapes and scribbles £40.

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YOU REALLY couldn’t make it up . . . another selection of curious classifieds from assorted publications. Contact details have been omitted to protect the not-so-innocent . . .

MAVERICK ABBEY with extras, very god condition £50 ono.

ROCKING HORSE fur - fully grown £15. Can deliver.

SWIMMING SEAT and sofa £5.

TODDLER GIRLS a bag full 12-18 and 18-24 £35. Can deliver.

HAVE SEVERAL very old dresses from grandmother in beautiful condition.

BAD ELECTRIC with accessories £18 ono.

LEFT HANDED Wilson good condition £30.

FANCY DRESS policeman aged 2 - 3 complete with trudgeon. Pet free home £5.

EIGHT PUPPIES from a German Shepperd and an Alaskan Hussy.

FULL LENGTH ghost £15.

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YOU REALLY couldn’t make it up . . . another selection of curious classifieds from assorted publications. Contact details have been omitted to protect the not-so-innocent . . .

DEVIL’S ROUTER 1020W £20 ono.

ANTIQUE DESK suitable for lady with thick legs and large drawers.

CORDLESS CASE for corded drill £8 ono.

QUILTED HIGH chair that can be made into a table, pottie chair, rocking horse, refrigerator, spring coat, size 8 and fur collar.

10 HORRIBLE books £10.

FOUR POSTER bed, 101 years old. Perfect for antique lover.

PROFESSIONAL ANTHONY cost £99 accept £20.

MODULAR SOFAS. Only $299. For rest or fore play.

LARGE DOLLS with opening fronts exposing insides - very good condition £80.

THREE CANARIES of undermined sex.

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YOU REALLY couldn’t make it up . . . another selection of curious classifieds from an assortment of British newspapers. Contact details have been omitted to protect the not-so-innocent . . .

MULTIPOSITION IN yellow, VGC £25 ono.

BAG OF baby, 6 - 30, immac con, exc working order £25.

DISHES SUITABLE for fiesta £10 each.

100% GENUINE black leather gent, large, exc cond, as new £25.

BUNDLE OF baby girls aged 9 - 18 MTHS - lots of designer including DNA, all good cond £50.

PINK HAPPY snack fantastic condition 5 point harness £30.

UPRIGHT VGC could deliver £30.

POP UP baby as new, style will deliver for £19.99.

SIZE 14 bridesmaid - forever yours delivered for £65.

DOCTORS MASSAGE - buyer collects £25 ono.

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YOU REALLY couldn’t make it up . . . another selection of curious ads that have appeared in the classifieds of assorted British newspapers. Contact details have been omitted to protect the not-so-innocent . . .

WARM HAND relaxing - unwanted gift £4.50.

POCKET SCRABBLE most letters there but lost lots - hours of fun £1.00. Can deliver.

BAG OF crap - use to someone but not me. Can collect.

SWIMMING TRUNKS slightly worn and rubberised with age but are nice and of interest to person who licks old swimming trunks. Can deliver.

SNAP ON head - always handy for whenever you need one - like when you have hangover £15.

FOLD AWAY walking bum - soft to firm. I deal for when ground is muddy. £10. Buyer must collect and clean.

TWO ROLLS of used cling film - very good quality £5.

MURDER FOR sale £2.50.

MANUAL ADULT big wheels. Used occasionally good condition £80.

WELL BREAD jack working £150.

BLUE BABY - offers - also pink and yellow babies.

YELLOW / BLUE baby high with out £40.

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YOU REALLY couldn’t make it up . . . another selection of real advertisements that have appeared in the classifieds of assorted British newspapers. Contact details have been omitted to protect the not-so-innocent . . .

TRAVEL DOG used once from spain airport £80 ono.

RECLINING ELECTRIC pink flowered £150.

PLAYFUL CHILD £5.

BAG OF black things - all very black. Can deliver if you live near me, £1.50.

PORTABLE PORCH £55.

SIP HANDY mate £65.

DOG GAUGE extra large for extra large dog £40.

EXTENDING ALUMINIUM £45.

UNDER FLOOR 12″ top £175.

LARGE STURDY average condition £15.

SET OF four wheels for car - all different sizes, slightly used, bargain £150.

REEBOK MIND and body £5.

FERM BUM router £8 ONO.

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